5.12.2010

Break it down.

I just got off the phone with the florists connected to Costco.com, and I am still bawling my eyes out. Well, hello breaking point. Hello, wedding stress level that I have so far been able to abate. Hello bride a week and a half before her wedding. Who is this person?

So, wait, what happened? Let me tell you.


source.

On Saturday, my mom and I ordered flowers on Costco.com. We decided on the combo box above for my bouquet and the aisle decorations. It had three different blooms and seemed like the best deal. We also ordered three boxes of baby's breath, but they're not the problem here. What's the problem? Well, you'll notice that the roses in this particular box are red. However, I saw a review on the site from someone who got the roses changed to white. Plain red obviously doesn't go with burgundy, so I would have them changed too. No big deal. So, we proceeded with the order. I got to the end where you verify the order and place payment and, oh wait, there were never anywhere to leave comments or requests about the order. I had just sent in an order for red flowers. No bueno.

So, I called customer service immediately. Well, apparently I called too soon, because they lady on the phone told me that my order had not gone through yet - she said it could take an hour to two hours and that they were closing in 55 minutes. She said that my best bet would be to e-mail them my request. So, I did e-mail them. That night. I let it rest all day yesterday because I figured it was their first day back open and I should give them time to respond. This morning I checked. Still no response.

I decided it was time to call again. The man on the phone instantly transfered me to the floral department where I am told that it is too late to change my order because it has already been sent to fed-ex to be fulfilled. Wait, what!? She told me that she had no record of my request and there was nothing she would do. Well, of course you have no record of my request - nobody told me that I should or even how to message the florists directly. Anyway, my previous attempts were apparently useless, and now it was too late.

It was about this time that I started crying. And I do mean crying - like full-on bawling to the point of hyperventilation and inability to get a word out crying. Oh, and I pulled the wedding card. After my flood of tears and comments like "it's for my wedding, so it's not like I can exchange them after they arrive" and "I need them to be white - red won't work, the bridesmaids dresses are burgundy", the lady on the phone was legitimately freaked out and scrambling to find a way to help me. After approaching her manager about it for a second or even third time, she was given the go-ahead to allow me to change my order. She instructed me on how exactly to e-mail them directly, and assured me that as soon as the e-mail went through, they would work on getting the color changed. I thanked her profusely and sent the e-mail.

Am I happy to have the flowers changed? Mostly. I'm relieved I guess. Am I proud of my blubbering? No way.

Although I didn't purposely cry to get my way, it certainly appears that way. The tears came because the stress of the wedding and all that I have left to do and the weight of the event that is about to happen all came crashing down on me at once - I am busy and tired and stressed and excited and anxious and overwhelmed - things like that tend to bring tears (and lots of them) to my eyes. But really, I was faced with an unfortunate circumstance, a threw a tantrum, and I got my way. That's not really how I want to act upon the cusp of the most adult moment of my life thus far. That's not really that flattering or admirable of me. It is, however, very common. Brides are to breakdowns like peanut butter is to jelly. They're expected. They're joked about. There are even entire tv shows centered around the stigma and assumption that a bride is known to - and will - go absolutely crazy in the process of planning her wedding.

I understand that with this much pressure all grouping together and climaxing upon one very important day, there is sure to be stress, tears, and a breakdown or two. But, I am making the decision right now to not allow myself to be ridiculous. Things will go wrong. So what if we end up with some red roses? I'm sure we could have made do with the rest of the flowers in the bunch. So what if something doesn't get finished, is forgotten, or doesn't happen the way I planned? I get to marry the best man I know in just over a week and that's what matters.

What kind of breaking point moments have you hit? How do you calm down and remind yourself of what matters?

4 comments:

  1. This just happened to me last weekend - I actually posted about it today. It was the first time the stress got to me and I couldn't stop the tears. Thankfully it all worked out, but it definitely made me realize that I should be EXCITED to be marrying my best friend after 6 and a half years and not stressing because my dress doesn't quite fit.

    So glad everything worked out for you, though! You're almost there!!

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  2. Aw, honey, I'm sorry you had to deal with that and that you're so stressed. But don't be too hard on yourself. Like you said, it's totally normal. Don't add to the pressure by stressing about being stressed out.

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  3. I would definitely be busting out the tears in such a situation too. Anger and stress always get the tears going for me too. Glad it worked out in the end though

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  4. i don't blame you a bit. I would have had a cow. This is a big risk you take when you do your own flowers!!
    I'm so glad they were able to work it out and that your stress levels stay low for the next couple of weeks!

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